screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
