You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i out mim tonsoeep
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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