covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize