you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Randomize
