I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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