i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize