booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Randomize
