I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
