I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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