Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
