i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
