I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
