Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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