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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I need to sanitize my soul.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
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