My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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