Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
