no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
