the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
