Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
