I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I just want to make out with him forever
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
