I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
