He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
