can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
