you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize