Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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