someone threw a dead crab at me
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
