Midget sex pt 2 tonight
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
When are your genitals available?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
