Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I intend to get homeless drunk
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
