He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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