Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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