Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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