Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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