omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
