You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
