What a fucking waste of an outfit
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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