my soul wont recognize me after tonight
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You smell like stripper and shame
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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