We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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