Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
