I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
