I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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