and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
