And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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