Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
