i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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