i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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