? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
