saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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