I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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