If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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