Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
