Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
